My name is Margret - i recently was married for the 4th time in February 2010. i know that sounds so "elizabeth taylor like" - but trust me - there's a story.
I grew up just east of Syracuse NY with a single parent, my mom, and 5 siblings. We are irish/italians, as are most from that area. Grew up in the projects, while i saw my dad whenever we could, he worked about 80 hrs a week for the City of Oswego Ny. , so he paid child support, but we didn't see him much because he had to work alot.
Fast forward to 14 yrs of age, my mother and i butted heads and she kicked me out to go live with my father. After 9 months, i went to live with my oldest sister and her husband. But after he tried to molest me, she told me i had to leave, at 15 years old.
So i went to my 2nd oldest sisters house, got enrolled in high school, got a job at a local pizza dept. - but soon after my sisters husband, a hells angel, tried to make his moves on me as well. I just turned 16. The next step was off to the local children s home for the wayward, as i had no where to live and was in danger of being a street kid.
The childrens home placed me within 6 months in a home with 5 kids as the nanny. 3 months later, the husband molested me and i told the wife, she left with her 2 kids from a previous marriage. there i was, 16 yrs old, with a man who was 30, and three kids - ages - 1, 5, and 7.
I tried to go back to my moms, but that didn't work, and the kids cried and begged me not to leave because they wouldn't have a mommy. so the man i was living with, got custody of me as my guardian and used that authority to sign papers as my husband. - i know by this time you're thinking how sick of a story this is- trust me- i agree!
Fast forward - 26 yrs old - i have a baby by this man, she is 2 yrs old, i get a job at
But we did it and i got a small apt- in the hood - but it was mine and i had a small paying job, but we did it. Long story, made shorter, i tried to get divorced only to find that i was never married the whole ten yrs! i felt like i was gonna die, i stayed with this man, who was verbally abusive for years because of the kids and i believed in the idea of making marriages work.
I got an annulment, and went on to marry a physically abusive man, who almost killed me. After 2.5 years i finally left him - got a new job - met a new guy at work. One year later, married him. Two years later, we realize marriage was not for us, nice man, but we should've stayed friends.
Spent the next 6 yrs - getting in touch with myself, learning why i was making such poor choices in life. Got focused on work, became a successful project manager from 2000 - 2008 - tripled my income - made good money but was miserable. This career was not what i wanted my life to be. I felt i had way more to offer society and could give back to the many therapists that helped me through my very difficult times over the years.
I now am married to a wonderful man i met two years ago on meetup.com, and we have our own small business. My daughter will be 16 and its time to start finally getting my schooling under way to be able to "give back" the way i truly want.
I work as a Court Appointed Special Advocate and function as a officer of the Supreme Court where i have the important role of speaking in behalf of kids that can not speak for themselves, I take this role as a serious one because my own experience tells me there are so many kids with stories like mine and like me often there is no one to turn to for help that kids need and the most important time in their lives, these are the kids that predators look for and the rest is history .
as responsible adults each of us must work to change the effects of what happens when a child is denied the important things they should have, small things like food and shelter,guidance with parents that love them and show it by there nurturing with each other as a family.
This blog is about what happens when kids are denied, and what can we do as adults and my effort to learn and explore and share what i can to bring more attention to this problem in our modern world. I will also expand on my own story ,so far this is the short version , but there are things i think the world ought to know, its not going to be pretty but let the chips fall where they may,no more will i allow myself to be silent about things that ought to be spoken about ,about pictures that ought to be seen, and stories that ought to be told and about NAMES that ought to be mentioned .
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